Men's Jokes
Lots of FACTS abt. MEN

Danish version... English version...

  • Hvorfor kommer m�nd ikke i overgangsalderen??
    - De sidder fast i puberteten...
  • Hvorfor er blondinevitser s� korte??
    - Det er for at m�nd kan huske dem...
  • Hvad kalder man en mand med en halv hjerne??
    - Begavet...
  • Hvad sagde Gud, da han havde skabt manden??
    - "Det kan jeg g�re bedre..."
  • Hvorfor vil en mand ha' en jomfru??
    - De kan ikke t�le kritik...
  • Hvorfor gi'r m�nd deres penis navn??
    - De vil v�re p� fornavn med ham, der ta'r alle beslutningerne...
  • Hvorfor skabte Gud manden??
    - Fordi vibratoren ikke kan sl� gr�s...
  • Hvad har m�nd og �lflasker til f�lles??
    - De er begge tomme fra halsen og opefter...
  • Hvad er forskellen p� en mand og E.T.??
    - E.T. phoned home...
  • Hvorfor er der hul i penis??
    - Manden skal jo ha' ilt til hjernen...
  • Hvad kalder man det uf�lsomme sted ved roden af penis??
    - Manden...
  • Hvad er forskellen p� m�nd og svin??
    - Svin bliver ikke til m�nd selvom de bli'r fulde...
  • Hvorfor synes m�nd, det er s� sv�rt at holde �jenkontakt??
    - Bryster har ikke �jne...
  • Hvorfor gnider kvinder sig i �jnene, nar de v�gner??
    - Fordi de ikke har nosser, de kan kl� sig i...
  • Hvad har m�nd og sperm til f�lles??
    - Der er 1: 1000000 chance for, de udvikler sig til mennesker...
  • Hvilke ord hader en kvinde at h�re, n�r hun dyrker vild og dejlig sex??
    - "Skat ... jeg er hjemme"...
  • Hvorfor spiser m�nd ikke M&M's??
    - De er for sv�re at skr�lle...
  • Hvorfor ka' m�nd li' BMWer??
    - De kan stave til det...
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ENGLISH VERSION

  • Why don't men reach the climacteric?
    - They are stocked in puberty...
  • Why are blondes jokes so short?
    - It gives the man a chance to remember the jokes...
  • What do you call a man with half a brain?
    - Gifted...
  • What did God say when he had created man?
    - "That(!) I can do better..."
  • Why does a man want a virgin?
    - He doesn't like bad reviews...
  • Why do men give their penis names?
    - They want to be on first name terms with the one who makes all of the decisions...
  • Why did God create man?
    - Because a dildo can't move the lawn...
  • What does a man and a bottle have in common?
    - They're both empty from the neck upwards...
  • What's the difference between a man and E.T.?
    - E.T. phoned home...
  • Why does the penis have a hole?
    - The man needs oxygen for his brain...
  • What do you call the insensible part just at the root of penis?
    - The man...
  • What's the difference between a man and a pig?
    - A pig doesn't turn into a man when it gets drunk...
  • Why does a man think it's difficult keeping eye contact?
    - Boops don't have eyes...
  • Why does a women rub her eyes when she wakes up?
    - Because she doesn't have balls she can scratch...
  • What's the similarity to a man and sperm?
    - The chance they'll grow to be human is 1:1000000...
  • What words does a woman just HATE when she's just had hot and wonderful sex?
    - "Darling ... I'm home"...
  • Why don't men eat M&Ms?
    - They're too hard to peel...
  • Why do men like BMWs?
    - They know how to spell the name...
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Updated 13-04-99 * Copyright � LisbetChili 1999